Posts tagged ‘Fatherhood’
Suddenly Sixteen
To My Beautiful Daughter,
It’s the morning of your sixteenth birthday and I am at the kitchen table, banging out this essay instead of working, because our days are too full to allow this Dad enough free time to keep his annual promises. Our life schedule has us pinballing between school and home, baseball fields and volleyball courts; a relentless gauntlet of practices and tournaments and road trips and plane trips that leave little time for planning or decent rest. We have rushed past the signpost marking your Sweet Sixteen day and I am caught unprepared.
I don’t know how we got here so soon, too soon. I was holding your tiny hand just last week, keeping you upright while you discovered walking. Next week you will likely be asking me for money and the car keys, on your way out the door.
Reaching the halfway point of your teenage years means you can be found on the couch with a cat in your lap, “second screening” Netflix, while staring at your phone. This is peak teenager now and I can’t say I wouldn’t have done the same if such options were available in April of 1980. There are other aspects of your adolescent life that make me pause during those rare, quiet moments at home. For example, you are a big, strong girl. I know saying such things can be uneasy for teenaged girls to hear but you move amid a group of big, strong, female athletes. I know you won’t take that poorly. After all, in your crowd, you are only 5’8″.
We have traveled quite a bit this year thanks to that packed club sports schedule. Hawaii was the crown jewel of your volleyball tournaments – three days of incredible competition followed by a few more days of sun and surf and amazing food. You were an all-star on those courts, carrying your team to the best performance you have experienced at a travel tournament so far. Off the court you splashed in the bright blue waters of the Pacific, strolled through shopping malls with your volleyball tribe, and ate nearly every food option on the island. I am proud of your adventurous spirit when we travel. It makes setting an itinerary easier when I have a planning partner, though your ability to assess time, distance, and cost needs work.
In the middle of these journeys together we have stayed up too late on school nights watching LOVB matches, and stopped at nearly every Starbucks and sushi spot on our routes. As usual, your brother continues to vex you though you two are never far apart. The sibling dustups are less frequent, and when they do occur you say the worst things at each other; a relentless barrage of over the top emotional slaps, in the brutal language of teens, that serve more to release emotion than cause pain. You love him more than anything and are his biggest defender, even as he annoys you with his loud chewing, epic cologne applications, and unwillingness to adjust the car seat.
All of your athletic success aside, I worry about your remaining two years of high school. Your grades aren’t in line with your future goals, and I can’t seem to get you to pay attention to that fact. Maybe you will surprise me by applying the same level of enthusiasm for developing a good GPA as you do for your wardrobe, complexion, back row passing skills, and Starbucks points.
Driving is the next adventure and having you behind the wheel will be both terrifying and life altering. I drive all over this Earth taking you to school and volleyball practice and matches and baseball games and everywhere else you need to go. I fear for you because I know what it’s like out on those crazy streets. Why we let teenagers on the road, in charge of a speeding hunk of metal, is a mystery. If our history in any indicator, I will anxiously watch you succeed well beyond my expectations.
Today we celebrate you by sweet sixteen daughter. I am proud of all that you have accomplished in your young life. You are a leader on the court, a loving big sister, and the best daughter in the world.
Happy Birthday to you, my Little Boo, my Norah Grace.
Hop Dad 